I'm going to start this up again. Probably pretty important right now to do this as I need somewhere to keep my thoughts organized and moving forward. Honestly, I need to journal in a book that has a lock on it so tight even a proctologist couldn't unlock it - or Oceans 13. That's not going to happen. And since it's not going to happen, I'm going to move past the drama and into the light.
Some amazing things have been happening in my life. So here it goes :)
Several years ago, before we needed to make the move back to Florida, I had done some research on getting my Yoga certification. Not happy with the idea of learning to teach Yoga from an online course, I searched and searched for one that fit my personal needs. One place in particular stuck out to me. Yoga Energy Studios in St. Petersburg Florida. I spied on them through Facebook and watched the interactions between the owners and their community. A few times I would even make the odd comment because I was compelled to join in the conversation. Boy was I wowed. I received comments back! Nice ones! Ones that were actually relevant to my comments! And smiley faces on top of that!!! Move forward a couple years and I had the opportunity to take an online Yoga course. It sounded good, had the right accreditation and even applied to other courses. I was concerned and needed some advice - so I wrote to Vie from Yoga Energy Studios. WOWED again - she wrote back!!! And was very kind, very informative, and very very supportive. I was hooked. They had me. I had already known in the back of my head this was where I wanted my instruction, but her response proved this was where I needed to be. There was no talk of "come to us" so we can make money off you, there was no "our program is the best" we want to sell you our lesson plans. It was straight from the heart and the advice was given directly to ME for ME. I think I fell in love at that moment. I knew I needed more time with these folks. So I started participating in more of the comments, sending them things I thought they might be interested in, and stalking some more.
You know what I found out? That they had been following me. They had not only answered questions, commented back, but knew things that I didn't think anyone paid attention to. They were learning about me while I was learning about them and it felt good. And when they wanted me to pass their love onto the horses and hubby ...well....yeah. Hook, line AND SINKER now. And Instagram. Boy did that door open up a world to me.
I followed, I watched, I learned. Then, one day there was a challenge put up from my friends Vie and Tim. You see, not only is Yoga a not so secret passion of mine, but learning how to Stand Up Paddle was driving me BATTY!!! Here was a yoga challenge where I might actually win a board, or better yet YOGA INSTRUCTION!!!! I was going to do it. Put my big ole bad ass body out there for all to see and do my best to win the challenge. I didn't want the grand prize of the SUP Board and all the goodies - I wanted the yoga instruction! As far as I know, that was the only way I was going to get instruction. You know what? I did it!!! and you know what else?! I STOOD UP!!! There are many who didn't think I would be able to. Including my own mom. But I did it. Vie took special time with me (the other two there were regulars with the group) and she taught me something very important. Don't use the word TRY. When you use the word you are giving yourself permission to fail. You are admitting out loud that you don't have confidence that you CAN. It was after she told me that....and corrected me several times - ever been corrected by a Greek woman? Though she be mighty, she be strong! - I said out loud "I will stand up" - and I did! Not only did I stand up, but because I hadn't put doubt into my action by the word "try", I didn't fall back into the water. Instead I paddled, and paddled, and paddled.
Several months have passed now. Life has again gotten tumultuous and I have had no time for myself. The exhilaration of the moment has been overshadowed by the hardships we have gone through and the isolation I am in. It's time to change that and change it big time. My life in Christ has grown since we've been at Fuel Community Church, although for some reason our friendships haven't, we are at least being fed spiritually and that is the most important thing in the world to me. It's time to recharge that vitality that I gained that day on the water at Vanoy Park. It's time to start that course on becoming a Certified Personal Trainer that I wanted so badly and prepare myself for the next challenge in my Yogi life which is Beginner Therapeutic Yoga Instructor. There is so much much more. But I'll save it. Time to register my class and get to work.
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